6 Jackie Mason One-Liners

1. I have enough money to last me the rest of my life, unless I buy something.

2. Did you ever hear of a kid playing accountant - even if they wanted to be one?

3. Eighty percent of married men cheat in America. The rest cheat in Europe.

4. The British are so polite. If an Englishman gets run down by a truck he apologizes to the truck.

5. Money is not the most important thing in the world. Love is. Fortunately, I love money.

6. If a crook picks on you, what're you gonna do? Call a cop! If a cop picks on you, what're you gonna do? Call a crook?